Friday, July 10, 2015

Tiny

Just logged in to my linkedin account and well, looking at some of my peers profile. Some of them really have cool profiles, I mean, it is clearly written there that they got high GPA, scholarship/outstanding awards, wonderful work experience in some awesome companies. Out of sudden, I feel so small. so tiny when I saw my profile with them.
 
I kinda feel like I really haven't done much during the last three years to improve my grade or to motivate myself to be a more competent person. I still remember that during Semester 3, I found out that I am the only international student and I felt so lonely that I no longer concentrate on my studies. I know I am such a chicken but during my first year I was with my friends (unfortunately, they are all international students) at all time. I felt so shocked to be an alien in a class full of 150 students. I began to hate how they speak Cantonese at all time and I got not friends, honestly. My grades turned out to be so bad and It felt so uncontrolled.
 
Looking back, that was such a freaking silly act of me. It was simple actually, it was just that I haven't adapted and I shouldn't neglect my studies. Now if you might wonder, I have a group of local friends to hang out back in class. But, it was so hard to recover all my grades that I really need to work harder and harder. I totally regret it. How I could abandon my studies and get so deep with my own "depression". It was actually nothing, I feel like I am exaggerating my emotion too much last time .-.-

It was totally silly and I learnt a lot from that. After Semester 3, I work hard to recover my grades and well, thankfully, it is stable now. but I don't think it's enough yet, .... comparing to my other friends. I regret so much that I only have one year to improve but well, what can I do?

Now I should really concentrate on my last year, and land a job successfully next year! :)